Congratulations! You made it. Welcome to the cheesiest blog post you’ll ever read. You may have accidentally stumbled upon this post, but alas, you are here and there’s no turning back. To hook you in, here’s a picture of a hot, new, Jazz-R&B-hip hop group that is crushing the music scene in DC: Daddy Boban and the Funky Bunch. Album drops June 2016. Featuring new tracks like, “Late Dinner Thief”,and “Weird Asparagus”.

ISH Residents hanging out

And now, back to business: I wanted to write about how “ISH” really embodies the sentiment of this House. Those exact three letters and the sound that they make when you say them together. For example, at the International Student House, we’re all adults…ish. We’re all students…ish. We date…ish. We meet in the lobby at 9…ish. We know how to network, cook, and be successful, young professionals in DC…ish. We’ve got life figured out…ish.

Not to mention, were all distinguISHed merit scholars, most of us are quite outlandISH, and some of us are FinnISH and speak SpanISH. (I couldn’t help myself.) Once I started thinking about how we are all in this “ish” phase in our lives and how much “ish” we all deal with on a regular basis, it hit me:

ISH is more than just a physical place, it’s a way of being.

It sounds so cheesy, but it’s true. This is essentially to say: we are in a very weird place in our lives. We’re in a gray area. We’re doing the limbo in the “in-between” space that comes right before entering into adulthood and after school (this place is also commonly referred to as the Front Page.) At the end of the day, we’re all just a bunch of kids, living in a crazy, fun house together, learning how to navigate the ups and downs of life, relationships, identity and everything in between. The best part about it is: we’re all learning how to do it together. It’s an incredible feeling to come home to a house of open-minded, brilliant, thoughtful humans that are going through similar life struggles and triumphs (i.e. figuring out how to be “normal” around your colleagues, winning first place in trivia at Bier Baron,  etc.)

ISH is a living, breathing thing. It’s a concept. It’s something that connects people that are thousands of miles away. It’s not just a brick building filled with old school furniture and bread rolls. It’s a mentality.  

I’ve lived at ISH for nearly two years. I have learned so much about myself and the type of life I want to lead as a result of my time at this one-of-a-kind place and the one-of-a-kind people I’ve met. During my time at ISH, I experienced a lot of personal “firsts.” I had my first full-time job (which came with a lot of other “firsts”); I fell in love for the first time, had my first real identity crisis, it was my first time living with three other people in the same room (and many, many more.) A lot of these “firsts” I experienced alongside my friends at ISH and I could not be more grateful for their companionship during this time in my life.

Without question, the greatest thing that I’ve learned at ISH is how sweet life can be when you are part of an intentional community.  Someone once said that the quality of your life is measured by the quality of your relationships. In my mind, this couldn’t possibly be more true. Community is really the only tangible thing in this world.

The community at ISH is special. It really is. It has impacted so many people—no matter the length of their stay. Most communities are defined by traditions that are continuously upheld and constant. ISH is fascinating because it has constantly changing traditions, evolving community values, and rotating residents that cycle in and cycle out. When you stop to think about it, the fact that ISH itself is more than just a place where people find temporary housing and go to bed at night is truly astonISHing. If a community can be fostered in a fluid environment with a lot of seemingly concrete barriers between people at ISH, it can be cultivated anywhere.

In just a few short weeks, I’ll be leaving the International Student House and will be propelling myself into the scary and cold world of adulthood. Even though I’m sad to go, I’m also extremely excited to take what I learned at ISH and create my own community elsewhere.  Now that I know how incredible it is to feel at home with a group of people who were once strangers—I can’t wait to extend that same practice of openness, kindness, and acceptance to others and build a village in this city.

I am going to miss (or should I say mISH) so many things about this House. I’m going to miss the late night talks over water in the dining hall, the weird smell of the library, the asparagus at Sunday dinner, Resident Salons and guitar nights in the Great Hall, the couches in the basement, this whirlwind time in my life, and the satisfied, happy feeling of coming home to good old 7B.

I will continue to cherISH this place and these people long after I move out of ISH. Like I said, it’s a mentality. It’s a way of being. The “ish” phase in my life isn’t necessarily coming to a close once I leave this place (and maybe it never will!). One thing I know for sure is that the memories I’ve made here, the things I’ve learned, and the connections I made will truly stay with me for the rest of my life. I hope to carry on the legacy of ISH in everything I do going forward and always put myself out there and get to know others in a genuine, real way because of the experiences I’ve had here.

I hope to bring with me the same open-minded, fun-loving, innovative spirit that has made this community such a wonderful place to live and grow.

To finISH off this very gushy blog post, I’ll close with a quote from Howard Thurman, who so brilliantly wrote: “Ask not what the word needs. Ask what makes you come alive…then go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” To all of my ISH family members near and far: thank you from the bottom of my heart for helping me come alive.  It is with your kindness, well wishes, and all of our memories that I dive head first into the next chapter of my life. Here’s to you, ISH!

ISHn’t Life Sweet? Top 10 Favorite ISH Moments  

Recently, I’ve been having moments where I just pause and think, “Wow. Life is good.” Nine times out of ten, I have those moments when I’m around my friends from ISH. I truly could not be happier to live with these people and in this House, especially at this time in my life. This past weekend we hosted ISH’s (second annual) Talent Show and had an evening full of performances, laughter, and general merriment. After the show, we hung out for a bit in the TV Room—just chatting, playing guitar and singing. The best kind of night.

I looked around the room at everyone singing “Let It Be” by the Beatles and felt what I can only describe as saudade. It’s a word in Portuguese that claims no direct translation in English. It means feeling so incredibly happy in one singular moment and then at the exact same time, feeling so horrible knowing that you will only experience that exact moment once in your life. There will never be another place and time when I will be 23, listening to this specific group of people singing “Let It Be” on a Saturday night at ISH. As far as feelings go, it’s actually quite beautiful. It’s a simple feeling of intense appreciation for how limited and precious our time is, especially the time we share with each other. *Cue the Graduation song by Vitamin C.*

I know that when I leave the House and look back on this time in my life, I’m going to remember nights like that one.  Knowing full and well that I will have many more moments of saudade in my life, I hope that instead of feeling sad that my life in ISH is over, I’m able to smile when I think back to this time in my life, the memories, the people I met, and this blog post!

1. Sunday Volleyball.

2. Not So Secret Truth or Dare.

3. Work From Home Wednesdays.

4. Pirates on the Potomac.

5. Right Side Flank.

6. The Day We Discovered Pisco Sours.

7. The time we stood in line for 55 minutes for a Belgian beer and waffle. (And it was so worth it.)

8. “Cherry blossoms, cherry blossoms everywhere!”

9. Gyals Night (Escalate)

10. ISH Goes Global.

And that’s a wrap! To all of my friends out there featured in this post, I hope this made you smile!

An Open Letter to the New Residents of  International Student House,

First things first, welcome to our ISH family! We are essentially the family from My Big Fat Greek Wedding, except we won’t pester you about being a vegetarian and none of us have lumps on our throats with our twins inside (at least that we know of). As all families do, we have our characters (the token crazy uncle, the grandpa that no one wants to get in political debates with, the lovable baby cousin, and so many more.) Each person in this House has their own unique story—but together, we make one big, happy (albeit at times somewhat dysfunctional) international family. We cannot wait to welcome you to our community. We all love each other here in this House and we will soon love you too!

To get some logistical matters out of the way, you should know the following:

1. Late dinners. Ah, so much to say. You can sign up for late dinners on the clipboard in the dining hall any time before 4PM or ask a kind soul to sign you up (preferably not on the Whatsapp group). Just know that you definitely do not want to ever miss Italian night or Mexican night, so plan accordingly. (You’ll thank me later.) To get a better idea of what meals are like at ISH, check out our Facebook page: Fine Dining at ISH or take a look below at a photo of a classic Italian night meal captured by House resident Robert Eklund. And one more tip: if you want to get seconds, don’t use your same plate twice. Just don’t. Trust me on this one or you’ll have Hassent to answer to!

2. Resident Salons. Every Sunday at 8 PM in the Great Hall, we gather as a community to listen to one resident (or several) present about a topic that they have expertise in, are passionate about and is of interest to other residents in the House. In line with the mission of the House, the Resident Salon series allows us to come together and talk about our thoughts and ideas, exchange stories and experiences, and learn from one another. In the past, topics have been: The Economics of Innovation, Sexism with Chinese Characters, Mass Incarceration in the US, Persian Film, and many more! Take a look at the picture below from a presentation given by Finland’s finest, Robert Eklund, on: “The Nordic Nerve System: How Geography Dictates Freedom, Prosperity and Foreign Policy Up North.”

3. Sunday “dinner.” Here’s the 411 on Sunday dinner: you’ll be asked to stand up and introduce yourself, 9/10 times you will be eating salmon, you’ll have great conversations and many laughs will be shared, and you will definitely spill ice all over yourself when you pour yourself a cup of water. Just be ready for it. Don’t miss these! And don’t be late! They are an important tradition in our House. When your time is over at the House, you’ll also say your goodbyes at Sunday dinner. If unconventional goodbyes are your thing, you’ll fit right in. Take a look at a picture below of Italy’s Marco Spreafico saying goodbye while standing on his chair at Sunday dinner:

4. Thursday nights at the Front Page. We’re convinced that we made Front Page on Thursday night a “thing.” You simply cannot pass up $2 coronas, 90s music, and awkward dance moves with your fellow residents on a weekday. Clear your schedules! (And while you’re at it, also pencil in trivia night at Bier Baron on Wednesdays at 7. This is a new tradition that is on the rise!)

5. Assassins. If you haven’t heard of this game before, you will once you move into the House. Essentially it’s a game of elimination. Each person has a target and is also someone else’s target. You are assigned specific tasks by the Mastermind that you have to get your target to do in order to successfully eliminate them. There are also mid-game challenges, riddles, and battles. I’ll leave it at that (intentionally not including any pictures so you don’t have an edge on the competition when you move in!)

6. ISH Running Club! I have to admit there is some bias here. As the only *consistent* member of the ISH Running Club for about a year now, I am in desperate need of more running buddies! DC is an amazing place to run, with a lot of great outdoor running trails and scenic spots. If you don’t believe me, read former resident Adam Hannah’s post or take a look at the pictures below.

7. Music in the Great Hall. Some of the greatest memories I’ve had at ISH have been during evenings when we’ve decide to just hang out, play guitar and sing in the Great Hall. The weekend trips, mini ISH adventures and nights out are all a lot of fun (and are when so many insiders are born), but the quiet nights are what really make ISH feel like home.

Last but not least, I’ll leave you with this: living in the House is truly what you make of it. These people will surprise the hell out of you with their life experiences and how much they know, make you feel and insane amount of happiness and joy, and will be there for you to boost you up on your toughest days … if you let them! Open yourself up to everything that this House and these people have to offer, and trust me, you won’t be sorry that you did. In the first few days, the House can be a bit isolating but if you take the plunge and let others see who you are, you’ll make some of the greatest friends you’ll ever know and discover pieces of yourself along the way. At least I did. J

I know I speak on behalf of the entire House when I say that we cannot wait to meet you and welcome you into our crazy, one-of-a-kind family!

All my love,

Katherine

In his recent article in The New York Times, “Why Giving Back Isn’t Enough,” Darren Walker, current president of the Ford Foundation, argues that “giving back” is necessary, but not sufficient. Walker explains that while feeding the hungry is among our society’s most fundamental obligations, we should also question why our neighbors are without nutritious food to eat. As Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. once said, “Philanthropy is commendable, but it must not cause the philanthropist to overlook the circumstances of economic injustice which make philanthropy necessary.” In short, giving back cannot substitute addressing the root causes of inequality in our country.

I’ve been thinking a lot about this recently, mostly because it’s the season of giving and I spend the majority of my days thinking about how to measure social impact. Not to mention, my roommate from South Africa at ISH came home with me to New Jersey for Christmas and the two of us singlehandedly started an epic Christmas dinner debate about racism and inequality in the US. Given that the majority of my family members are conservative and outspoken, the conversation was eye opening to say the least. Ever since then, this article and our conversation has been on my mind.

When I first started my job, I read a lot about the history of philanthropy in the United States. I was surprised to learn that formal philanthropy dates back to 1889, when Andrew Carnegie drafted a charter at the peak of the Gilded Age, at a time when inequality in the US had hit extreme levels. Carnegie and many others argue that inequality on a grand scale is an unavoidable condition of the free-market system. (I have many thoughts on this. Likely a future blog post!)

I agree with Walker’s point that addressing the systematic issues that perpetuate human suffering is crucial for global development. However, I also believe that too often we neglect to question our own circumstances and the role that we play in the system. As Walker explains in the article, we should seek to bring about lasting, systematic change, even if that change may adversely affect us. I think that philanthropy and even the concept of “helping” can be dangerous, insofar as it removes the responsibility to question why the system benefits some and not others. As Walker explains, as a nation, we need more investment in education, but not without questioning educational disparities based on race, class, and geography.

Walker argues that philanthropy can no longer grapple with what is happening in the world, but also how and why.  The system and practice of philanthropy in the US needs to be restructured. I agree wholeheartedly with this point and agree that we must prioritize empowering all people to be part of this process. As Walker explains, we should ensure that the voices of those affected most by injustice—women, racial minorities, the poor, religious and ethnic minorities and LGBTQ individuals—help decide where and what philanthropy goes towards, not simply receiving whatever philanthropy decides to give them.

However, I believe that allowing those who are affected by injustice to weigh in on how and what philanthropy is being used for is—again, simply not enough. We must first shift our mindsets to redefine those to whom we “give” and “help.” And even the concepts of “giving” and “helping” themselves.

The concepts of “helping” and “giving” are inherently based on inequality. They do not represent a relationship between equals. When you help, you use your own strength to help those of lesser strength. When you give, you may inadvertently take more away than you could ever provide. Giving and helping are all about ego. Not to mention, helping incurs debt. When you help someone, they owe you. Serving on the other hand is mutual. When you help, you feel satisfied. When you serve, you feel grateful.

Service is a relationship between equals. We all draw from our experiences and we all have something to contribute. Service serves us and others. Service rests on the basic premise that the wholeness in us serves the wholeness in others. Fundamentally, service requires respect for all people and the acknowledgement that we are all one degree away from tragedy. When we choose serving over giving, we are able to start reimagining philanthropy and can begin to question and address the root causes of inequality in our country. Every person is equal in dignity, and when given equal access to rights, resources and opportunities, there can be significant impact.

Giving back is not enough. Instead, let’s invest in each other. Only then can we unleash our power to lead our own change and work on behalf of the dignity for all.

As always, thank you for reading! I wish you a very happy and healthy New Year!

 

Greetings! I write to you from the Great Hall of the International Student House. I’m currently snuggled up under a blanket next to the fire, sporting pink striped fuzzy socks and reading Anne Marie Slaughter’s Unfinished Business. I started jotting down some thoughts in my journal—but then I thought, who better to share them with than my loyal followers on the ISH blog (Hi Mom!).

Lately, I keep having moments where I think about how sad and nostalgic I am going to feel when I move out of ISH (roughly 25-30 years from now… just kidding!). I know that I am going to reflect back on my current life and think about how amazing it was, mostly because I lived at ISH and had the opportunity to meet such brilliant people. Thinking about how “future me” is going to feel has encouraged me to be more present and make time every day to appreciate and celebrate all of the big and small moments of my life.  I recently read an article in The New York Times about practicing gratitude and it really resonated with me. Essentially the author made the point that gratitude breeds happiness; happiness does not breed gratitude. It seems pretty obvious: choosing to f ocus on the good things instead of the bad things makes us happier (and also fatter according to this new study.) No wonder Thanksgiving is associated with eating to our heart’s content!

For me, practicing gratitude on a daily basis is no easy task. I take my education, my privilege, and my mental and physical health for granted more than I’d like to admit. Aside from singular moments of appreciation, it’s not until I am deprived of my usual comforts or actively put myself in someone else’s shoes that I truly appreciate how lucky I am.

A few weeks ago, a group of ISH residents participated in a “Sleep Out” to raise awareness and fundraise for the Covenant House, a shelter for homeless, disconnected and exploited young people living in Washington, DC. We had the opportunity to meet with current and former residents of the Covenant House and hear their stories before sleeping outside of Freedom Plaza. We were all incredibly moved by the residents and by the stories of those who were participating.

When we were all laying in our sleeping bags later that evening, one of my fellow House resident explained that the he enjoyed the discussion because of “how refreshing it was be taken out of your own world view.” I couldn’t agree more. I came away from the Sleep Out feeling more knowledgeable about how pervasive youth homelessness is in DC and grateful for so many things in my life. We are all especially grateful for all of the support we received from Board Members who donated to our team and for Linda Harper who organized the event and slept out with us!

Having just celebrated Thanksgiving, I hope this post serves as a personal reminder to always focus on the good in life, to be grateful for all of the big and small moments, and to constantly be present and open to new experiences and worldviews.